Thursday, August 15, 2013

The War of Waiting

Alright ladies, this one is for you. And I'm tellin' it to ya straight.

I have gobs of single friends lookin' for the man of their dreams. Gobs. Fabulous, amazing, beautiful friends. Everybody is looking for love and often, as the song says, in the wrong place. It breaks my heart because I want everyone I know to experience the incredible gift of a healthy and happy marriage. I know there are lots of stories and reasons and explanations for the things people do, but I hate seeing women hurt or worse, continuing to allow men to hurt them mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically because they are afraid to let 'em go (and let's face it. The only reason you keep a guy like that around is because you're afraid of something...)

Anyways, as friend after friend and story after story has been coming my way lately, I was reminded of a post I wrote last year about this very thing. Read it. I know waiting for the right guy can feel like you are on the front lines of a war. It's painful and the stakes are high. Sacrifices must be made and the right moves are critical because they could change the entire trajectory of your future. However, puhlease believe me when I say it is worth worth hunker down and wait for the right one.

And now, the biggest question to be asked is...What to do while the war of waiting is raging? Drown your sorrows in countless hours with your girlfriends, martini in hand? Getcha a good head shot and start workin' the online dating scene? Get a Netflix subscription and pour over every romantic comedy available vicariously living through the unrealistic characters? Although I exclude Downton Abbey fanatics from this last one (lol), the answer is a resounding no.

And no.

Focus on becoming the type of person God wants you to be (which is ultimately the type of person you have to be to attract a guy worth having anyway).

Jen Smidt of Mars Hill Church in Seattle puts it best with her post "8 Things That Reveal A Woman's Character." Wow. Could not have said it better myself and such a healthy way of reflecting on your course in life no matter what your martial status is.

If you are a dude reading this post, you aren't off the hook. There's one for you too :) Read "8 Things to Convince You of a Man's Character" and see if you are someone who's worth the wait.


  1. hmmmmmm good words.
    Thank you for sharing this.
    As a single gets hard. I love how you worded this "the war of waiting". I couldn't have said it any better myself. It is definitely a war between settling and being patient; between doing what you ought to be, and just sulking.
    Paul says to count singleness as a blessing - satan wins when we let our hearts get distracted by the pain of absence. hmmm....definitely a thought provoking read. I'm going to go troll through the "8 things that reveal a woman's character" now...i'm sure it will kick me in the face. :)

  2. Stopping by from Amy's blog. :)

    Loved this post and the other you wrote last year!

    " with integrity. Drop that dude like a bad habit if he shows you anything other than honesty, respect, and Christ-centered love." This. Every bit of this is something that we can always be reminded of as single women! Thank you for this encouragement as we are in a "war of waiting!" :)


  3. Here's another good article for singles: